The Observer of life

I am an observer of life.

Of many people and events.

I watch as the life of those around me unfolds.

As they go through the ups and downs that it throws at them.

It makes me ask myself,

Who am I?

Why isn’t my life more like theirs?

Why do I suffer to get something that they easily attain?

Is there something wrong with me?

That others seem perfect while I seem defective.

All these questions run through my mind,

As I observe the life of others

As I observe their relationships with one another

And how so many things come easily to them

Soon I’m overwhelmed by a feeling.

But no, it’s not jealousy

For why should I be angry over a blessing bestowed on a person?

It’s a feeling of unhappiness and loneliness

A feeling that doesn’t seem to disappear

No matter how hard I try

It seems isolation has become my habitat, my home

When I try to run from it by being with company

I’m always thrown back into the abyss of loneliness

Maybe I’m not meant for a life of company

And I’m doomed to remain in isolation

Watching the lives of people pass me by

For such is it for an observer of life

Photocredit: DextDee Photography (https://www.facebook.com/DextDeePhotography)