Birthday Week

Photo by me

Birthday week

And so many thoughts run through my mind.

As a kid birthdays are things to celebrate and be excited for.

A day everyone is obligated to give you a gift,

And you are obligated to eat cake and have fun.

Every child's favourite day.

But as you reach adulthood,

You dread getting any older.

Cos the older you get the more responsible you have to be.

The more friends and family expect from you.

The older you get the lonelier it gets.

Your friend circle gradually reduces.

Even though Facebook says you have over 1000,

In reality they can be just two people.

Growing older can be daunting,

And highly emotional.

I believe people celebrate in their adulthood

So as not to be hit with the depressing emotions.

Cos such a day can be sad,

When celebrated on your own.

Parties are good distractions.

Reminding you of the positive things in your life.

Without a celebration all your left with are depressing emotions,

Of things gained and lost.

Unattainable hopes and dreams.

Some say birthdays are a thing of celebration

I believe it is a day to reminisce.



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New Year

New Year.
But nothing really changes.
Days look and feel the same,
Only dates continuously change.
We obsess with resolutions and celebrations,
Trying to make the first hours of a year memorable.
And quickly forget that a year is not a day,
But filled with 364 days more.
All which conglomerate to make a year.
So a new year shouldn't be celebrated in one day,
But for all the days throughout.
Because each day brings something new and different.
New experiences that shape your life,
Some good, others bad.
Whatever the case, make the best of them.
So cheers to a new day.
Everyday.



Photo Credit: DextDee photography

Time

Time.
Our best friend and deadliest foe.
An entity that exists forever without any consequence.
The only evidence that something ever truly existed.
The saying goes,
That time is on our side.
But time is on its own side.
Not respecting any laws except it's own.
It ages us,
Gives us new life and experiences.
And doesn't stop to mourn,
When our existence is cut short.
It goes on
Unaffected by all the events through history
And the lives it touches daily.
So utilize every chance you have with time.
Because though it may not remember you,
Others in your life will.
So make a difference in a person's life.
Affect it in a good way.
Cos human connection,
And the feeling of belonging and being wanted,
Is what keeps us human and sane. 

As time passes in our lives.


Picture taken by me

Looking Down to the Future

Despite the odd title of this article this is an important analogy of life.

This analogy can be likened to the growth and life cycle of trees. When a seed is planted, it doesn't immediately sprout from the ground. It starts out by first growing its roots, and making sure the roots are firmly rooted in the soil. It ensures that these roots are able to reach the vital nutrients it will need for its growth throughout its life. Vital nutrients like water and minerals. As such, the process of the seeds growing roots can take a long time, even years, because finding a good source of nutrients is very crucial in any life cycle process. After the roots have grown to great lengths and an adequate amount of water and nutrients are found, the seed now sets about to germinate i.e. grow in height. That is the stage where it starts to grow out of the soil, and its stem and leaves can be seen. This stage, unlike the growth of its roots, occurs quickly.

    An important life lesson can be learnt in this. A lesson in  life, career path or in anything a person decides to do.
A person's decisions in life can be likened to the seeds that are planted. These seeds are watered by a person's decisions, external influence, advice of people and life lessons. As such, these determine the direction of one's growth in life. Thus your life can be stagnant, stunted or healthy, depending on how you water your seed.
Strong, tall and fruitful trees take years to firmly establish their roots before beginning to sprout. They don't compete and go along with the timetable of other trees around them. They are independent and ensure they are rooted firmly, before allowing themselves to be noticed from the ground.
Our roots are our values. How a person nurtures those values and allows it to mold them, will determine the type of tree they become.

There is no rush in life. Great things take time to develop and grow. As is portrayed by plant life. With this, nature teaches us an important lesson. That patience truly is a virtue.




Photocredit: DextDee Photography (https://www.facebook.com/DextDeePhotography)

THE POWER OF PEOPLE AND COMPANY

         We are all limited by our knowledge and experiences of life. From the various things we have each been through in our lives we have formed a profile of lessons and moments that guide us as we continue to live through each day. It’s humanly impossible to have all the knowledge and experiences in this world. Even those with unique abilities to contain a large amount of knowledge can’t have all the world’s experiences. Our experiences are brought about by our environment, namely where we live and perform our daily activities, as well as the people we come across and interact with daily. In all it’s safe to conclude that no two person’s are alike because no two people go through the same experiences and if they do, they experience it differently and come out of it differently.

          Everyone has questions that we ask each other but the answers you get from people are limited by their knowledge and experience in their own lives. Some questions in life don’t have the same answers, because different people give you different answers, according to their experience and knowledge of it. That’s why in search of answers to questions in your life, you must go to the One person who has ALL knowledge and knows what will work for you and is BEST for you. That is God. It’s good to ask for people’s advice but in the end the only true advice you should take is God’s. If it tallies what others told you, then you can also lean on them to help you carry out the answer.  

        Due to our varied life experiences, it is imperative to be friendly to everyone you meet and come across. Because any of them can be instrumental in helping you out in an aspect of your life in the near future. That's why there should be no room for racism or narcism which keep people boxed in a cave making them unproductive in their life and careers.
        Everybody is important and nobody is insignificant. We all have a different roles to play in each others' lives. By playing our roles well not only do we make an impact in a life but we make the world a better place by bettering our fellow humans.
        Make a positive impact in people's lives from today and eventually it will be payed forward into your life sooner or later

A Few Misconceptions about Wallflowers

I see the world as a looking glass where each person represents a different view and perspective of it. Every person’s experiences and lessons in life is different. The only similarities are the running themes.

Most see the life of a wallflower to be emo (emotional), dark and dreary. Even in movies and television we are portrayed as lonely people living in misery and constantly unhappy in our lives, while secretly wishing to be popular and more outgoing like most kids. As such, this narrow-minded view and portrayal of melancholies sticks in people’s minds. In turn most wallflowers grow up in misery thinking something is wrong with their personae.

                That is how I grew up. I originally wasn’t a shy kid. But as a consequence of constantly changing schools, never lasting more than 2 or 3 years in one, that nature developed and soon became my staple. I guess it became my defense mechanism against making new friends since I knew I’d eventually leave and not see them again. For years I enjoyed being alone in my wallflower world. No worries, no troubles. And whenever I was lonely I always had television and movies to escape to. But these shelters also proved to be disheartening at times. For in the roles I could relate to, not only were wallflowers portrayed as outcasts, but their nature was seen to be a problem to the rest of society. Most of them were seen to be geeks or nerds who worshiped the popular crowd. Or they were seen to be the poster child for kids who commit suicide. This was also portrayed as only occurring with wallflowers because of their shy and quiet demeanor.

                These stories make us wallflowers feel inferior to those who are more outspoken and expressive. It makes us feel like there is something wrong with us and that God must’ve not loved us as much. That’s why He made us to yearn for the company of others, yet be unable to go out of our comfort zone and meet people. But the truth is, God loves us all. He made us different from others so we could experience His love in a different way, and know Him more as we retreat to our fortress of solitude. It often annoys me when people who aren’t wallflowers and hence have spent no time living in people’s shadows, give me social advice and assume how easy it is to meet and make new friends just because it is their daily bread. Such people never understand what it’s like to have no friends at all or what it’s like to lose friends. They don’t mind losing friends because they can make more than the number they lost in that same day.

                I hardly talked to people growing up. I always stayed in my corner, focusing on school and minding my own business. Yet that wasn’t enough for people. Several people, in fact everyone, that I met always asked what was wrong with me. They all find my quiet nature to be unnatural and most of them concocted sad and abusive stories as to the why I am the way I am. To this day people still do so. The only difference is, now I don’t cower and feel inferior to them like I used to. Now I’m proud to be a wallflower.  


 Picture: Courtesy of Dextdee Photography

Through The Eyes of A Wallflower

A wallflower is defined as a shy person who goes unnoticed at social gatherings and is often found lingering by themselves against a wall. Such people are often ignored and even invisible to those in the crowd. People see them as boring, dull and uninteresting. But on the contrary they are more interesting than most sanguines. It's their shy nature that serves as a deterent to their social skills but at the same time it also benefits them. Being shy allows wallflowers to observe their surroundings more and as such they are more open to learn and accumulate a variety of skills and knowledge. However most of these skills and knowledge are kept to themselves and not shared with the rest of the world, who shun them due to their outward demeanor. Wallflowers are also found to be very gifted and artistic but often these talents are suppressed because they are often too shy to share it with the world and fear rejection.
I am a wallflower. With  this blog I intend to share my life experiences and perspectives in order to show others how diverse we wallflowers are. One disadvantage of being a wallflower, is that people don't understand what I go through. Whenever I try to explain a problem I'm going through to a friend, they mostly attribute it to me being short-sighted about the problem, or they simply do not understand. But the truth is, wallflowers are the most open-minded people, because of their pessimistic nature. We view every possible side and angle of a situation. We even psycho-analyze ourselves and list possible solutions to the problems we go through. We only try talking to others about it because we need help in deciding which solution is best to take. It takes a lot of courage and effort for wallflowers, especially me, to openly talk to people about personal problems. That's why they choose a specific person or small group of people to talk to when such issues arise. However, when one or all of these people reject them or continuously misunderstand them, they lose that connection and eventually hope and trust they have in people. Gradually, they fall back into their instinctive wallflower ways by recoiling back into their shell.
That is my current wallflower status.


Picture: Courtesy of Dextdee Photography